Three Bad Movies

Jersey Shore Shark Attack (2012)
This is the second movie released in 2012 that I saw! I'll get to the other 2012 films I've seen in my next few posts. Of course while I saw those in theaters, this movie made its premiere on the SyFy Channel!
Jersey Shore Shark Attack is both a Jaws rip-off and parody of MTV reality show Jersey Shore at the same time. I don't think it will surprise anybody that this movie has poor acting and terrible special effects. However, I didn't expect that Jersey Shore Shark Attack would feature two actors from Goodfellas: Tony Sirico and Paul Sorvino! Both actually do a good job in their roles here considering the material. I would hope that they are getting better offers than this, but maybe these guys just have a good sense of humor.
I must mention that Joey Fatone, formerly of boy band 'N Sync, has a great cameo appearance!
Jersey Shore Shark Attack was produced by Fred Olen Ray who has directed and produced tons of low budget B-movies and exploitation flicks. I've never seen an Olen Ray movie before but keep in mind this is the guy who brought us Hollywood Chainsaw Hookers and Reptisaurus!  
Jersey Shore Shark Attack is not really a horror movie but more of a comedy with jokes that are hit or miss. Some scenes like the one with Joey Fatone or the line "Is that spaghetti sauce?" (referring to blood) are hilarious. However, others attempts at humor fall flat or too padded with boring scenes.
The writing was actually better than I expected in terms of the parodies and jokes. We even have some character development and a use of Chekov's Gun, or harpoon in this case. Unfortunately the basic rule of "show, don't tell" us violated in a major way once. I guess the reason for that is that the budget didn't call for a flashback so a character just tells a long story about what happened instead!
Our main characters are Jersey Shore knock-offs who are almost as unlikeable as their real life counter-parts. Despite this face it seems that the movie thinks we should actually root for them. The attempt at solving this problem of main characters who are easy to hate is that the villains are annoying snooty, rich, yuppies but I just wanted to see everybody eaten by the albino sharks!
While this is not a good movie, I must give it some credit for being entertaining enough. Too many bad movies are just plain boring so when a dumb fun one comes around I can't hate it too much. I could even see Jersey Shore Shark Attack getting a cult following someday, though I think this movie will be forgotten about once the popularity of Jersey Shore fades away.
Oh, and I love the tagline on the above poster: "Forget The Avengers, we have a new contender for best film of the summer." That must be a joke, taken out of context, a fake quote, or the critic just got really drunk!
I'll finish this review the same way the movie ends:
Fin
3/10

No Holds Barred (1989)
I'm not a wrestling fan but have always found it interesting. Professional wrestling features good guys, heels, larger than life personalities, a mixing of reality with fantasy, has always had a large dedicated fan base. If you think about it like that it is no different from the world of film!
Although Hulk Hogan made his film debut in Rocky III as Thunderlips, No Holds Barred is the first movie to feature Hogan in a leading role. Not surprisingly Hogan plays a professional wrestler (named Rip) who is not much different from Hulk Hogan himself. A rival TV network tries to get Rip to wrestle for them but Rip refuses to break his existing contract at any price. This leads Brell, the sleazy head of the World Television Network (played by Kurt Fuller who was in Wayne's World and many other movies), to start his own wrestling competition called "Battle of the Tough Guys." This wrestlers are extremely violent and play by no rules. For some reason they even have a midget in a cage over their ring! Eventually a mysterious huge guy named Zeus wins the tournament and demands to fight Rip. Fuller's performance as Brell reminded me of Q from Star Trek: The Next Generation but as without the god powers and more of a scumbag. Brell likes to call Hulk Hogan a "Jock Ass" which is pretty funny though it gets irritating after a while. Besides Hogan and Fuller, Jesse Ventura has a cameo (as himself of course!) and I also recognized David Paymer who has been in tons of films and TV shows.
The most outrageously hilarious scene of the movie features the now infamous line, "Dookie?!"
Check it out here!
As you can tell from that clip, a lot of dialogue is grunting and yelling. I guess it makes sense in a movie about wrestling. I wasn't expecting Shakespeare, but its still pretty funny.
This is the 3rd Hulk Hogan movie I've seen after Santa with Muscles and 3 Ninjas: High Noon at Mega Mountain. I have reviewed all on this blog and as you could probably guess, this is my favorite Hulk Hogan movie so far!
The weekend No Holds Barred came out in theaters in 1989 it debuted second in the box office behind Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade!
The first act is hilarious and engaging but the movie looses steam purely from an entertainment standpoint after that. These are still some amusing parts but after that the pacing slows down and the fighting gets repetitive. Although No Holds Barred is a bad movie its still a lot of fun. I watched it with a friend who is a wrestling fan and we have a blast. This is Hulk Hogan's Bloodsport though I still prefer that Van Damme flick to this one!
4/10

Merlin's Shop of Mystical Wonders (1996)
Ernest Borgnine died last week at the age of 95. He is one of my favorite actors as I love his roles in The Wild Bunch, Escape from New York, and many more films and TV shows. In honor of the late, great Oscar winner I watched the MST3K episode Merlin's Shop of Mystical Wonders with a friend.
The framing story of this movie features Borgnine as a grandfather telling stories to his grandson. The first story involves a couple with fertility problems who meet Merlin at his store. The husband doesn't believe he is really a wizard so Merlin gives him a book of spells to prove it. The man messes up the spell, fights a cat, then turns into a baby which his wife decides to raise. Then the grandfather tells another story about a toy monkey that can kill people when it clangs its cymbals which was stolen from Merlin's shop. Merlin tries to find the toy monkey before too much damage is done!
This movie is a stinking mess but at least there is an explanation. Merlin's Shop of Mystical Wonders was made out of the per-existing films The Devil's Gift (1984) with new footage stitched in. The monkey story obviously looks older than the other footage. The segments with the monkey is also said to rips off a Stephen King short story and I can't say I'm surprised.
Both stories are surprisingly violent, especially for what appears on the cover to be a family fantasy film.
Although this movie is terrible, its a great MST3K episode. This one is from Season 10 so its a Sci-fi Channel Mike episode. I loved the re-curring riffs on the infertility subplot and the geriatric grandfather.
2/10

Even though all these movies sucked, at least I enjoyed watching them for different reasons!
Next Up: Summer TV shows

The Vacation movies

This is the first of three comedy movie series posts. Today we start with the National Lampoon's Vacation series. I had seen parts of Vacation and Christmas Vacation awhile ago so I re-watched them all the way through. I also saw European Vacation and Vegas Vacation for the first time.

Vacation (1983)
The plot of Vacation is pretty simple. The father, Clark Griswold, wants to spend more time with his family (wife Ellen, son Rusty, and daughter Audrey) so he plans a cross country trip to from Chicago to California to visit Walley World (a fictional version of Disneyland). On the way there they visit some family members and are followed by a mysterious beautiful woman. Will the Griswolds make it to Walley World on time.. and alive?!
Vacation was directed by Harold Ramis. Ramis also made Groundhog Day and has written and acted in several other movies, including a few I have written about on this blog! The screenplay was written by John Hughes and is loosely based on a true story of a vacation his family took when he was a boy.
Not only are Vacation and Christmas Vacation the best two movies of the series, they are also the most accessible. Everybody has been on a crazy family vacation or had to spend a lot of time with their families during the holidays. Not everyone has been to Europe or Las Vegas. I know that not everyone has been on a cross-country trip through America and that not everybody celebrates Christmas, but those movies handled those topics in a more general yet personal way that all audiences can relate to.
Vacation is my favorite of the series and it is one of the best comedies of the last 30 years. The only thing missing is the song "Vacation" by The Go-Gos! That said, the Lindsey Buckingham song "Holiday Road" in the opening credits is awesome. I love it when movies do something interesting with the credits, and the use of colorful postcards from around America is pretty cool.
8/10

European Vacation (1985)
The hilarious opening scene of European Vacation features the Griswold family in the middle of a humiliating game show. With a lot of luck they manage to beat the other family and win a trip to Europe! The set-up is pretty solid here and they tried to mix things up since something nice happens to the family after all the crazy stuff in the last movie. Don't worry, shenanigans ensue in Europe, but this time Clark's stupidity causes problems for other people and not the Griswolds. While this was a good idea to not simply re-hash the oiginal, the biggest problem with the movie is that it doesn't really have a plot. The Griswolds win a European vacation and have an itinerary to keep up with but that's about it. There is a sub-plot about a sex tape being stolen but its too little, too late. It was set-up with a scene early on so I assumed that this would lead to the Griswolds running around Europe to stop the distribution of the sex tape, but that doesn't happen. John Hughes is given writing credit but the whole thing felt rushed to cash-in on the popularity of the first movie. The movie performed well at the box office so I guess it worked. The kids were re-cast and the new actors were not as good. I am pretty sure the new Rusty only got the role because he looks like the first Rusty, Anthony Michael Hall! This is also the only Vacation movie that doesn't feature Cousin Eddie and his family. To make up for that we have cameos from actors such as John Astin, Eric Idle, and Robbie Coltrane! Although European Vacation has its moments, its still not nearly as good as the original.
6/10

Christmas Vacation (1989)
The original is still my favorite but Christmas Vacation is very good comedy and a nice Christmas movie. The basic plot is that Clark, the father, wants to host the best Christmas ever for his extended family. While this is not as concrete as the goal in the original, (get the family to Wally World before the two weeks is up!) it works since we see old home videos of Clark's Christmases as a boy which show us how important the holiday and his family are to him. We also have a sub-plot about Clark's boss and a Christmas bonus which has a great pay-off. The kids are played by new actors again, but it doesn't matter since they were never the focus of these movies anyway. Christmas Vacation is quite funny and features another great blow-up by Chevy Chase! This one and Vacation are the only movies in the series you need to watch, so check them out if you haven't already!
7/10

Vegas Vacation (1997)
This is the only Vacation movie that John Hughes did not write the screenplay for. His magic touch is missed but to be honest this one just didn't need to be made. The series was running out of steam by this point and it doesn't help that this is the only one of the series to be rated PG! Vegas Vacation came out eight years after Christmas Vacation, the longest gap in the series. The children are re-cast yet again, although Chevy Chase has a great meta-joke about it: "You guys are growing up so fast, I hardly recognize you anymore!" The biggest problem with the movie is that it is not focused. Funny stuff happens in Vegas, but there isn't much of a real story other than the family going to Las Vegas for a vacation. We have a couple of sub-plots like Chevy Chase's character losing all his money or Wayne Newton (played by himself of course!) falling in love with the wife which are humorous, but that's about it. Randy Quaid returns as the wacky Cousin Eddie and even though its totally forced into the movie he and his family are pretty funny. Vegas Vacation is the weakest of the series but I've seen comedies that are a lot worse. It is not necessary viewing but if you liked the others or are a Chevy Chase fan there is some fun to be had here.
5/10

I am catching up on my posts but still have a lot more to do before I get back to my regular schedule.

Weekly Wrap-Up (11/27)

I saw five films this week, the first two of which are on Roger Ebert's Great Movies List.

Groundhog Day (1993)
I had seen part of this film before on TV awhile ago but finally got around to seeing the entire movie.
Bill Murray is great as always as the egotistic weatherman Phil, who is inexplicably forced to relieve the same day over and over again. Andie MacDowell puts in a nice performance as the news show's producer, Rita. MacDowell used her actual Southern accent which was a great creative choice as it adds to her character as a down to earth and genuine person.
Although there is no explanation for why Phil has to live each day over again, I think the mystery works and wouldn't change it. Apparently early versions of the script included an answer (an ex-lover cursed him to teach him a lesson) but its unnecessary and would have been a time waster. The setting of Groundhog Day festivities in Punxsutawney, Pennsylvania is just an unique as the premise and I really have to hand it to the creative team for doing something different that at the same time isn't completely unconventional.
Director Harold Ramis has worked with Bill Murray before as an actor in Stripes and Ghostbusters and also directed him in Caddyshack. Ramis would later direct the fantasy-comedy Multiplicity which featured MacDowell as the female lead opposite Michael Keaton.
Groundhog Day felt sort of like a twisted version of It's a Wonderful Life, as it is certainly Capraesque while at the same time has modern day sensibilities. The film is truly cinematic with its cuts of the repeating day, which could not have been done as a book or play. The film's tone is perfect as it is funny but never silly, and has drama but is never too dark or serious. Groundhog Day has more substance than most comedies and at the same time is incredibly entertaining which is quite an accomplishment.
9/10

The Silence of the Lambs (1991)
Anthony Hopkins' role as Dr. Hannibal "the Cannibal" Lecter has been so firmly entrenched and parodied in popular culture that most people who haven't seen the film are familiar with the character. While I was worried that this would cause me to enjoy the film less, I was mistaken as his character and the movie itself still packed a hell of a punch. Hopkins was fantastic and certainly deserved his Oscar. Besides Hopkins the acting was strong by all the actors, including Jodie Foster who won an Oscar for her performance as the young FBI officer in training, Clarice Starling. The Silence of the Lambs also won Oscars for Best Picture, Best Director (Jonathan Demme), and Best adapted Screenplay.
The movie is based on Thomas Harris' book series. I haven't read the books so I don't know how it works as an adaptation. I know there are other films in the series which I might see eventually but what makes Lector's character work is the mystery around him and too much screen time (Hopkins is only in the film for just over 16 minutes!) would certainly hurt that.
Although Ted Levine doesn't have too much screen time, his creepy performance as Buffalo Bill is the cherry on top of an incredible film. The Silence of the Lambs is unsettling and disturbing which makes for an unforgettable movie that certainly deserves the praise it has received over the years.
9/10

The Blues Brothers (1980)
This was the first, and arguably best, movie based on a Saturday Night Live sketch. Dan Aykroyd and John Belushi play Elwood and Jake Blues, two brothers who try to raise $5,000 to save the orphanage they were raised in from being closed by getting their band back together.
Chase scenes have been a staple of comedy films since the silent era. The Blues Brothers keeps this tradition alive with some great car chases: one inside(!) a mall and one all over the city of Chicago with Aykroyd and Belushi being pursued by both the police and Neo-Nazis!
It was nice to see Carrie Fisher in a movie that wasn't a Star Wars film, and she has a great role as a mysterious woman trying to kill the Blues Brothers. John Candy (who steals every scene he is in) and Paul Reubens have early roles. There are also appearances by many musicians such as James Brown, Aretha Franklin, and Ray Charles. Also, director Steven Spielberg makes an unexpected cameo!
It is usually a bad sign when a comedy is over two hours long, but it makes sense in this case since The Blues Brothers is also a musical.
I had a lot of fun with this movie and it was better than I has expected. I prefer it to Belushi's earlier film Animal House (also directed by John Landis), although I like both comedies.
"We're on a mission from God"
8/10

In the Mouth of Madness (1994)
I am a big John Carpenter fan and finally got around to seeing this movie in my quest to watch all of his films. Like several other of Carpenter's movies, this one didn't do well critically or commercially upon its original release but has since gained a cult following.
In the Mouth of Madness is about an insurance investigator (Sam Neill) who looks into the disappearance of a horror novelist whose works are supposedly driving his readers insane. This meta concept is given a  Lovecraftian spin to make for an interesting and unique tale. The acting is a weak at times as Sam Neill goes in and out of his accent and Julie Carmen's performance leaves much to be desired. Charlton Heston and Jurgen Prochnow are good, but could have had more screen time.
While I haven't seen all of Carpenter's films yet, In the Mouth of Madness is his best post-1980s movie. It is not one of Carpenter's best films, and not as fun as other cult classics like Big Trouble in Little China or They Live (which makes sense because it is a horror flick after all), but its still a good film that Carpenter and horror fans should enjoy. I think the reason it didn't do well was because it came out a few months after Wes Craven's New Nightmare, also released by New Line Cinema. Although I haven't seen that film yet, it seems to have a similar concept except with the popular Freddy Krueger character.
7/10

Penn & Teller Get Killed (1989)
As a fan of Penn & Teller I had been meaning to see this movie for a while. However, the film is pretty obscure and did not get a DVD release until recently. Luckily it can be seen on YouTube in nine parts, which is where I watched it. Although I like Penn & Teller's work (see my last post which talked about the duo) I think they work better live or on TV than in movie form. That said, this is still a good dark comedy. Although the movie is episodic at times, there is a main narrative with plenty of twists and turns. I think all Penn & Teller fans would enjoy this movie as not only do we have a  younger and thinner Penn Jillette, but the usually silent Teller actually speaks! I had seen an interview with Teller talking on YouTube before but it was still strange to see and hear him speak even though his voice is quite normal.
David Patrick Kelly, Sully in Commando, plays the fan who is obsessed with Penn and Teller. Penn & Teller Get Killed was the final feature film directed by Arthur Penn, who also made The Miracle Worker and Bonnie & Clyde.
7/10

Weekly Wrap-Up (11/20)

This week I saw four films. Two of them were fantastic and two were bad. I'm a firm believer that one cannot truly appreciate great cinema without watching terrible movies as well!

Pulp Fiction (1994)
Pulp Fiction is the second Quentin Tarantino movie I've seen. I had watched Reservoir Dogs before and really liked it, so I was looking forward to this film and luckily it did not disappoint. Although Pulp Fiction has been heavily ingrained in popular culture to the extent that I was already familiar with some lines and and scenes, I was completely engrossed and found this to be an amazing film.
The weakest part of the film are the scenes featuring Bruce Willis' character talking to his wife as the movie's pace slows down to a near halt. I understand that the scenes in the hotel room were necessary and the pay-off was certainly worth the slow set-up. Although Tarantino managed to pull off a dialogue heavy movie where even conversations about a five dollar milkshake were fascinating, the chemistry between Butch and Fabienne just wasn't there.
It is hard for me to pick a favorite moment as I loved the entire movie but Christopher Walken's cameo and the scenes with Harvey Kitel were pure gold. Now I need to see more Tarantino movies!
9/10

Adaptation. (2002)
I usually don't give a movie a perfect score upon my first viewing but had to make an exception here. Adaptation is proof that films can be incredibly entertaining as well as great works of art with something to say at the same time.
Nicolas Cage was amazing in a dual role as the Kaufman twins, Charlie and Donald. I have only seen a few of his movies but Cage seems to be an actor who is only as good as his director and script. To be fair this is the case for most actors (with guys like Bela Lugosi and Vincent Price being exceptions) but Cage played down to the material in The Wicker Man (2006) so much that I could barely believe this is the same actor. Although I had never heard of Chris Cooper before, he won a well-deserved Oscar for Best Supporting Actor for his role as John Laroche.
I though it was pretty clever how Being John Malkovich, made by the same director (Spike Jonze) and writer (Charlie Kaufman), was incorporated into this movie. The reason for this was because Charlie Kaufman not only wrote the script, but is also main character in Adaptation. Spike Jonze has only directed three feature films thus far so once I see Where the Wild Things Are I'll have seen all his movies. Hopefully he will make some more! While Kaufman has written more movies than Jonze, Being John Malkovich and Adaptation the only films he has done that I have seen so far.
While all aspects of this movie were great I was most impressed by the writing. The title itself, "adaptation," has a double meaning as it refers to adapting material to another medium as well as how people adapt to life. In the film, Kaufman is trying to write a screenplay adaption of the book The Orchid Thief and then writes himself into the script. The book is a real book and Kaufman wrote Adaptation under similar circumstances! The movie is incredibly meta and even deconstructs how screenplays are written. Kaufman use of himself as a character in his own movie reminded me of how Philip K. Dick did the same in his VALIS novels, which isn't surprising since Kaufman is a PKD fan.
It is worth noting that although Adaptation is credited as being written by Charlie and Donald Kaufman, in real life Charlie does not have a twin and Donald does not exist. That didn't stop Donald from also being nominated with Charlie for an Oscar for best adapted screenplay!
10/10

Cyborg (1989)
Cyborg was directed by Albert Pyun, who has made tons of low-budget B-movies and direct-to-video films. Pyun is the guy who directed the 1990 Captain America movie as well as Alien from L.A., which was featured on MST3K.
Cyborg stars Jean-Claude Van Damme in one of his earliest film roles. Van Damme's character, Gibson Rickenbacker, must help a cyborg get to a group of scientists in Atlanta as she is carrying the cure for a deadly virus which has ravaged mankind. However, an evil gang leader kidnaps the cyborg to use the cure for themselves. As you could probably guess, this movie rips off Escape from New York and The Road Warrior on its way to being a generic post-apocalyptic film. The only real difference is that Rickenbacker is a martial artist. But if I wanted to see that I would just watch Bloodsport again. Although this is a bad movie it is still watchable. The fights and special effects (such as explosions and the robotics on the cyborg) were actually pretty good. I was able to see this in High Definition and was amazed with how good it looked, especially considering it was a low-budget movie made over 20 years ago. The outside scenes looked like they could have been filmed today!
What really made this movie bad was the acting and writing. While there isn't too much dialogue the acting is over the top, even for a movie like this. The basic story makes sense but I still don't understand how Rickenbacker and the girl caught up to (and actually got ahead of) the gang. The gang traveled to Atlanta on a boat while Rickenbacker followed them by foot! Rickenbacker's back-story was interesting although derivative, but had jerky editing that made the flashbacks confusing at first.
If you like bad cinema, post-apocalyptic movies, or are a hardcore Jean-Claude Van Damme fan, you will enjoy this. Otherwise just watch Escape from New York and the Mad Max movies instead.
3/10

Abraxas, Guardian of the Universe (1990)
Jesse "The Body" Ventura is an interesting person. The man was a Navy SEAL, pro wrestler, actor (I enjoyed his role as Blain in Predator), governor of Minnesota, television host, and author. During Ventura's film career he made the mistake of "starring" in this truly terrible film.
Pretty much everything that can go wrong in a movie went wrong in Abraxas. The acting is awful and the dialogue is repetitive and silly. The film's story is incomprehensible, but I'll try to explain it.
An alien cop named Secundus (who has Arnold Schwarzenegger's accent) comes to Earth and rapes a woman with his hand who then gives birth to the child five minutes later. Another alien cop (these cops are called "Finders" although I don't know why) named Abraxas (Jesse Ventura) sends Secundus to space jail. These space cops can live for thousands of years but it is never explained how this is possible (are they androids?) and has no relevance to the plot. Five years later, Secundus somehow escapes to Earth so that the child (called a "comater" though again, never explained why) can give him the "anti-life Equation," a concept stolen from Jack Kirby's comics. Abraxas must stop Secundus with help from his "VD box," a rip-off of Ziggy from Quantum Leap, that is attached to his arm. Confused? Join the club.
The "VD box" is just unfortunately named. You would think that somebody would have realized that when most people hear "VD" they think "venereal disease." In this movie VD is supposed to stand for "vibrational detection," which is almost as bad now that I think about it! At least lines such as "My box has VD, trust me" and "Members of our force were taught to avoid VD" are unintentionally hilarious.
Abraxas features random music that never fits the scene and always feels out of place. The head-scratching camera work, editing, and directing make you wonder if the crew rushed the production or simply showed up on set drunk everyday. This movie is incredibly dark, and I mean that literally. Lighting is almost non-existent except for some outdoor scenes. Usually it is so dark that it is hard to see anything! James Belushi has a cameo as a school principal which he did as a favor for his wife at the time who was in Abraxas as Sonia. Despite Belushi being in this movie there is no intentional humor in this movie at all and the tone is always serious. Many B-movies realize how ridiculous they are and try to have some fun with it but Abraxas takes itself way too seriously. Oh, and while I'm at it, Abraxas liberally rips off The Terminator and shamelessly uses the word "terminate" many times. This movie failed in every way possible.
Luckily I watched the RiffTrax version which features a hilarious commentary by Mike Nelson, Bill Corbett, and Tom Servo of MST3K fame. RiffTrax usually makes fun of recent good movies so its nice to see the RiffTrax crew go back to some classic MST3K material. Although this movie is terrible, I do recommend the RiffTrax for some great laughs. Check out the RiffTrax sample for Abraxas here.
Abraxas is not a well-known bad movie like Plan Nine from Outer Space, Manos: The Hands of Fate, Troll 2, or The Room but it should be up there (or more appropriately "down there") as a craptastic classic of truly awful cinema.
1/10

Weekly Wrap-Up (9/25)

Ed Wood (1994)
Prior to viewing Ed Wood I had seen some Tim Burton movies I liked (Beetlejuice, Batman) and some I didn't like (Planet of the Apes remake, Mars Attacks). So far Ed Wood is by far his best that I have seen. I have only seen one Ed Wood movie, Plan 9 from Outer Space, and thought it was terrible. However as somebody who watches a lot of bad movies, I wouldn't call it the worst movie ever made as did have some fun, campy moments. The absolute worst movies ever made are so boring they are almost unwatchable. A few of Wood's movies were featured on Mystery Science Theater 3000, although I haven't seen those episodes yet. Getting back to the movie in question, Ed Wood blew me away. Martin Landau put in an amazing performance as Bela Lugosi and certainly deserved his Oscar for Best Actor in a Supporting Role that year. Johnny Depp was incredible as the titular character and how he didn't get an Oscar nomination is beyond me. Depp is a versatile actor and it is a shame that he didn't get an Oscar nomination until Pirates of the Caribbean. Depp has gotten a lot of wacky cartoon type character roles after the popularity of his Jack Sparrow character but he has great range as an actor and can do much more than that. Bill Murray and Jeffrey Jones are a lot of fun in supporting roles. Although the movie is about Ed Wood, people associated with him such as Bela Lugosi, Vampira, Criswell, Tor Johnson, Bunny Breckinridge all led fascinating lives and could have biopic movies of their own!
While Ed Wood was a critical success (besides Landau's Oscar it also won best Makeup) it was a commercial flop. This isn't surprising as most people wouldn't think you could make a good movie about a guy who made a lot of bad movies, but Burton still managed to make a great film.
Like most biopics and movies based on historical people and events, Ed Wood features its share of historical inaccuracies. However this was part of Tim Burton's vision as he was trying to make the movie through the eyes of Ed Wood. I think it is possible for truth to rise out of fiction and I believe it happened in this movie. While the real Ed Wood never met Orson Welles, Ed Wood did indeed idolize Welles, so I felt the scene in which they met was necessary to the movie (also it could have been a daydream since we only see those two together). Plus I think anybody who watches the film would be compelled (like I was) to do some research on the real Ed Wood as well as the other people depicted in the film. Bela Lugosi never cursed or hated Karloff, and his later years were not quite as bad as depicted in the movie. However, I wonder if Burton did this because he didn't want show Ed Wood's later years. The film covers Wood's life from just before he made Glen or Glenda to just after Plan 9 from Outer Space and while those movies were not successes, his later years were quite depressing.
Wood often gets called the "worst director of all time" which is unfair considering what he had to work with and that he never was able to focus on director since he also wrote, produced, and even acted in his films. Some people claim that the movie is too positive about Wood but since he usually gets slammed, I thought the way portrayal of Wood was fine. The film does have plenty direct criticisms of Wood like his refusal to do more than one take. Wood's optimism blinds him to these critiques and Depp sells it so well that I really wanted Wood to succeed, even though I knew that is not what actually happened.
Ed Wood was filmed in Black and White which was a great idea. Not only does it work for the atmosphere, it also gives us a hilarious meta joke in the scene in with the camera man is asked to pick a dress by color, but can't because he is color blind!
The film gives the sense that Ed Wood really loved to make movies, and from what I have read about the real Ed Wood, this certainly seems to be true. Wood didn't have the best resources but still did what he loved and for that he should be praised. It doesn't make Plan 9 from Outer Space a good movie, but the fact that people still talk about the movie and that it has almost 1,000 more votes on IMDB than Otto Preminger's Anatomy of a Murder which came out the same year (1959) and was nominated for 7 Oscars counts for something. Plenty of people have made bad movies and didn't care about the final product, but Ed Wood did care, even though his movies weren't that good. And you have to admire the guy for giving Bela Lugosi work in his later years. Even though Lugosi was older and working with inferior material, he was still having fun being an actor as you can see from the clips on YouTube.
When it comes down to it, Ed Wood is not only about the man, but about artistic vision and creative expression. And that is why the film transcends its subject matter to be inspirational to all of us.
"Visions are worth fighting for. Why live your life making someone else's dreams?"
I think I've said enough about this movie as I can, watch it now!
10/10

Say Anything... (1989)
After watching Jerry Maguire last week I decided to see another Cameron Crowe movie. I liked Jerry Maguire a little better than this one, probably because of the sports angle, but Say Anything was still a solid movie.
John Cusack does a good job of playing Lloyd Dobler, an off-beat oddball who becomes obsessed with Diane Court. Diane's father, James Court, is played by John Mahoney (Martin Crane on Fraiser) and has a close relationship to his only daughter. Mr. Court is an interesting character as his life is falling apart (divorced, being investigated for doing bad business by FBI, only daughter about to leave home for college on fellowship) while Lloyd is wooing his daughter, and in way taking her away from him. Lloyd's sister is played by Cusack's real life sister, Joan. I always think its pretty cool when real relatives play relatives in movies and their relationship reminded me of Jake and Maggie Gyllenhaal in Donnie Darko.
Crowe is a good writer and does a great job with dialogue and creating interesting characters. The film is a dramedy as it is more introspective than most teen movies, but still humorous.
The scene with Cusack holding the boombox and playing Peter Gabriel's "In Your Eyes" is iconic and certainly memorable. Although when it comes to famous scenes in Crowe movies I still prefer "Show me the money!" or any scene with Spicoli and Mr. Hand.
The movie features cameos by Kim Walker (Heather Chandler from Heathers who essentially plays the same character!) and Jeremy Piven who is a real life friend of John Cusack.
Overall I liked them film as it was well written and Cusack's Lloyd was a fascinating character. While I wanted to know if the couple would end up together, the movie still didn't really grab me. Sure Mr. Court doesn't like Lloyd as he sees his daughter less because of him, but Mr. Court doesn't seem to hate Lloyd either since Diane is never forbidden to see/talk to him. Perhaps there could have been more tension in Lloyd and Mr. Court's relationship.
While Crowe had writing credits for other movies prior to this one, Say Anything was his directorial debut and its a nice first film. Crowe is certainly a good writer, but the last two movies I saw by him just aren't really my thing. I still want to see Almost Famous as I've heard that is Crowe's best. Fast Times at Ridgemont High is still my favorite movie that he has written.
Crowe might not be my favorite director, but all of his movies I've seen so far have awesome pop/rock soundtracks, which is definitely a good thing!
6/10

                                       

Major League (1989)
This weekend Moneyball came out. Although I am a huge baseball fan who loved the book and heard the movie is getting great reviews, I haven't seen it yet. Instead I finally got around to seeing Major League! It's actually sort of a fictional comedy version of Moneyball as both films are about small market baseball teams who go on improbable playoff runs. Major League was written and directed by David S. Ward, who won an Oscar for writing the screenplay for The Sting. While many comedies often put their effort into jokes, Major League focuses on the story and characters first, and lets the humor fall into place from there. The characters are interesting and likeable, which makes you root for them to win. Wesley Snipes is mostly known for action and dramatic roles in recent years, but he did a good job of pulling off a fun character. Besides Snipes, Major League also helped launch the careers of Charlie Sheen and Dennis Haysbert (Allstate Insurance commercial guy). Famous Milwaukee Brewers announcer Bob "Mr. Baseball" Uecker plays the Indians announcer and he was great. Major League is a lot of fun although perhaps a bit derivative and predictable in spots. However, it is still one of the better sports-comedy movies out there. I just want to know why this movie has two sequels? And there is even news that Charlie Sheen wants to make a fourth movie!
I have read that there is an alternate ending for Major League that was intended to be the original ending but changed after reviews from test audiences. I won't say what happens but I think they should have kept that ending. The other ending isn't that different, but makes a little more sense and would have been a cool twist.
7/10

Death at a Funeral (2010)
This movie is the American remake of 2007 British film. I love the original, but figured I should still see both. I still don't see why the remake was necessary as the humor of the original was universal and not overly "British." Just release the 2007 film in American theaters!
Unlike the original, the remake has lot of pop culture references which will date the film. Now that I think about it, the Amy Winehouse joke is already dated! We also have musical cues that tell us when to laugh, which the British film did not need. This movie made a few other changes, I guess so it wouldn't be a carbon copy of the original even though it is still the same basic story. For example, Aaron (Chris Rock) and wife are trying to conceive a child. We also have Ryan (Martin Lawrence) hitting on an 18 year old girl at the funeral. In the original every subplot related directly back to the family reuniting at the funeral. Both these subplots felt shoved in just to add something new, even though there is already enough going on in the movie.
The cast is hit or miss. Danny Glover and Ron Glass (Firefly) were great but Tracy Morgan and Martin Lawrence put in weak performances. Peter Dinklage reprises his role as the midget from the original film. The part was initially written for someone of normal height, but Dinklage auditioned and got the role! Dinklage recently on an Emmy award for his work on the TV show Game of Thrones. While I haven't seen that show he was great in both versions of this movie and I'll have to see more of his work.
The remake sticks close enough to the original story. It is still funny even though its not as good as the original. There are far worse comedies out there, but please watch the original 2007 British film as it is one of the funniest and well-written comedies made in recent years.
5/10

Double Team (1997)
Double Team is a 90s action movie starring Jean Claude Van Damme and the outrageous basketball player Dennis Rodman. I have no idea who decided to let Dennis Rodman become an actor, let alone put these two together, but that person should be fired from the film business immediately. Dennis Rodman won three Razzie awards for being in this turkey: Worst New Star, Worst Supporting Actor, and Worst Screen Couple which he shared with Van Damme. Mickey Rourke plays the villain and he's actually not bad. The cast also includes Paul Freeman who is best known for playing Belloq in Raiders of the Lost Ark... oh how the mighty have fallen. The action scenes are decent but the acting by the two leads is terrible. The basketball one liners are so bad they are actually kinda funny. The plot doesn't make much sense but who cares, we have explosions and a lot of glass breaking for some reason! Oh and I could I forget the ridiculous amount of Coca-Cola product placement! Double Team is a great "so bad, it's good movie" as it is awful but still fun to watch. The ending features one of the most ridiculous action scenes in all of cinema and is worth watching for that alone. But unless you are a bad movie connoisseur like myself, just see the Nostalgia Critic's hilarious review here.
3/10

Summer Movie Round-Up Part 3 of 3

This will be the final post covering the movies I have seen so far this summer. Like the previous posts, this one includes 8 brief reviews.

I love Bill Murray, and he is at the top of his game in Stripes. Murray stole the show in Caddyshack (1980) but this time his is the leading man. Murray's character, John, loses his job and his girlfriend so he convinces his best friend Russell (Harold Ramis) to join the army with him. Ivan Reitman directed three films in a row with Bill Murray: Meatballs (1979), Stripes (1981), and Ghost Busters (1984), which also starred Harold Ramis. Although Stripes is a Bill Murray vehicle, we are also treated to early roles  from John Candy, John Larroquette, Judge Reinhold, and Sean Young who all add to the hilarity. The first two thirds of the movie takes place at boot camp where hi jinx ensue. However, it is the last act where the movie really shines. Murray and Ramis steal a secret government vehicle in order to meet up with their girlfriends only to have things get out of hand... and "That's the fact, Jack!"
Stripes joins a 7/10!

One of my new favorite directors is David Cronenberg. I absolutely love Videodrome (1983) and Dead Ringers (1988) and have been seeking out more of his films. They Came from Within (1975), also known as Shivers, was Cronenberg's first full-length film. Not surprisingly it is pretty raw, although since the movie is about parasites that infect the residents of a high-rise and turn them into sex-crazed zombies, it works in the film's favor. The special effects and gore are pretty good considering the low budget. Probably the best example is the horrifying bath tub scene which is depicted on the poster. It is interesting to see Cronenberg's body horror at an early stage and how the themes of flesh and technology would be further developed upon in his later films. Like most of Cronenberg's movies, this was filmed in Canada, specifically in the city of Montreal. Almost the entire movie takes place in an apartment complex. Even though it is a huge building, it leads to a claustrophobic setting since all the rooms and hallways are small to accommodate so many people, which helps add to the suspense. So far this is the weakest film I have seen by him, but I still enjoyed it. Cronenberg's next film, A Dangerous Method, will be released later this year and is about Freud and Jung.
They Come From Within infects a 6/10!

The last two round-ups have featured many movies from the last year or two, so now I get to change things up a bit with (so far) the oldest movie I have reviewed on this blog. The Mummy (1932) stars Boris Karloff as Imhotep and also features African-American actor Noble Johnson as "The Nubian." The film starts out with a fantastic scene in which the mummy is discovered in 1922. The screams are haunting and this creepy opening still holds up today. After this great beginning, the story jumps ahead ten years and unfortunately the story slows down. Imhotep pretends to be a modern Egyptian, and finds a woman who was his lover has been reincarnated. While the final scene is just as good as the first, most of the movie is dialogue heavy with not much happening. I am not asking for non-stop action, but it felt a repetitive at times. I did enjoy the flashback scene, although it was heavily cut for its theatrical release and that footage is sadly lost. Critics have never put The Mummy on the same level as Frankenstein (1931) or Dracula (1931) and although I haven't seen those films yet, I think I can see why. Simply put, not enough happens, although I think the explanation is that unlike those two films, this one was not based on a novel. I have a feeling that audiences in 1932 would have had a greater appreciation for the characters simply talking than we do today. But all things considered The Mummy is still a classic early horror film with great cinematography and atmosphere. Karloff manages to make his character an intimidating force to be reckoned with, yet one the audience feels bad for as he literally waited thousands of years to get back the woman he loves. Although Karloff had already hit the big time as Frankenstein's monster a year earlier, it was films like The Mummy that helped cement his status as a star. "Karloff the Uncanny," indeed.
The Mummy wraps up a 7/10!

I got to admit I was pleasantly surprised by Devil (2010). Although directed by John Erick Dowdle, M. Night Shyamalan is credited as a writer and producer. While I haven't seen Shyamalan's more recent films, I have not heard good things about them. However, Devil is a solid contained thriller about group of people trapped in an elevator who apparently have Satan himself in their midst. Like many of Shyamalan's films, this one takes place in the Philadelphia area, specifically center city. While I would have made the devil stuff more ambiguous, I did like it. The characters stuck in the elevator were well written and it was interesting to them interact with each other as the situation got increasingly worse. The detective investigating the situation is not played by the best actor, but I did like how his storyline coincided with one of the people in the elevator. Even if Shyamalan did direct this, I still wouldn't call it a comeback, but it is a step in the right direction.
Devil doesn't go to hell with a 6/10!

Time to take a break from horror movies and thrillers. I always thought that St. Elmo's Fire (1985) was a John Hughes film, I guess because it features so many members of the "Brat Pack" who were in movies like The Breakfast Club (1985). In fact we have almost half the cast from that movie here! St. Elmo's Fire is actually a Joel Schumacher film. Having recently watched The Lost Boys I was curious to see another of his pre-Batman Forever and Batman and Robin movies. St. Elmo's Fire is about the trials and tribulations of recent college graduates. As a recent college grad myself I felt it was the right time to see this one! Overall this wasn't really my cup of tea, although the characters were interesting and the directing was fine. What I want to know is how these seven guys and girls all became friends in the first place since they were all pretty different and it therefore felt like an unrealistic group. Also I don't understand how Rob Lowe's character got into Georgetown, but whatever. Anyway I'm glad I saw this since I had heard the quote "You cannot have the Pretenders' first album!" and now know its from this movie. Also featuring Andie McDowell and Jenny Wright (Near Dark).
St. Elmo's Fire burns up a 5/10!
   

Finally I get to write about a truly awful movie, Robot Holocaust (1986)! I first heard about this one through Mystery Science Theater 3000, so when I saw it was in available for free in HD via Comcast On Demand, I had to see it. Once or twice I had seen a MST3K movie in its original form, but never has one looked so good when it comes to picture quality. The plot (or lack thereof) is about a rebel named Neo who teams up with a robot that makes Jar Jar Binks seem like John Wayne in comparison. Together they meet up with a woman warrior, a Beastmaster wanna-be, and a rebel girl in order to defeat an evil computer ("The Dark One" although it is a glowing orange ball and not dark at all!) that has taken over the world. This movie rips off everything from The Terminator to Star Wars to Mad Max to Alien. When a movie borrows music from Laserblast, you know its going to be bad. If you took a drink every time a character uttered "the Dark One" you would be in a coma in 10 minutes. As bad as this movie was, I got through it without too much permanent brain damage so it was still watchable. I was laughing at it and cracking jokes, but I've seen some movies so boring and bad that I couldn't even do that. Robot Holocaust is still in so bad its good territory, although barely.
After watching the movie I decided to see the MST3K episode. This is a first season episode and I noticed that Joel and the bots use more sight gags in the theater than in the later seasons. Also it was interesting to see Josh "J. Elvis" Weinstein who played Dr. Forrester's original sidekick Dr. Laurence Erhardt as well as Tom Servo. Dr. Erhardt would be replaced with TV's Frank (played by Frank Conniff) and Kevin Murphy took over as Servo. I thought he was fine (he was a little annoying as Dr. Erdhart though that was the point) but that the other two were simply better fits for the show. For an early episode I was surprised about how good it was. I loved the recurring jokes about Valaria's "accent" and the Ted Nugent references. One of my favorite riffs was "In the future, all robots will act like Don Knotts!"
Robot Holocaust craps out a 2/10. Stick with the MST3K episode.

I have now seen two movies directed by Wes Craven, but still haven't gotten around to seeing A Nightmare on Elm Street. Funny how that works out. I liked Craven's The Serpent and the Rainbow (a cool zombie flick) as well as his work on the 80s Twilight Zone (the show is nowhere near as good as the original but still a decent sci-fi/fantasy/horror anthology show and better than the 2002 version). However, Shocker (1989) was a bit of a mess. Shocker is about a serial killer who comes back from the dead after being killed on the electric chair. The main problem with Shocker is that it doesn't know what it wants to be. At first the main character, Jonathan Parker, can interact with the killer in reality through his dreams. This part is kinda like The Dead Zone meets Nightmare on Elm Street. Then after the serial killer, Horace Pinker (Mitch Pileggi) comes back from the dead, he can inhabit the bodies of other people and the dream aspect is mostly dropped. The first two acts are played pretty seriously but the movie turns into a horror-comedy for the last act when the serial killer uses a satellite dish to go inside television programs! While this was a huge tone shift that felt out of place, I must admit, it was funny. Horace sucks Jonathan into the TV in an attempt to kill him and they run through everything from war films to Leave it to Beaver! One of the things I did like was the revelation which established a strong connection between Jonathan to Horace. Mitch Pileggi was great as a serial killer and Ted Raimi had a fun but small role. I enjoyed the 80s metal soundtrack. Although the directing was fine, the writing could have been a lot better. When Horace's supernatural powers like taking over bodies and traveling through television signals are revealed to others, they buy into it way too quickly, even newscasters! I wouldn't mind this if the story was taking place in the world of Harry Potter or something, but this is clearly grounded in the real world and these are unrealistic reactions. Also the actor who played Jonathan, Peter Berg, wasn't very good and often whispered his lines for no reason. I think I'll stay away from Craven until I get to see Nightmare on Elm Street and Scream.
Shocker shocks its way a 4/10!

I loved the first Fright Night (1985) so I had been meaning to see Fright Night Part 2 (1988) for a long time. Although this is a fantasy-horror movie, unlike Shocker it clearly takes place in the our world as the movie starts out with Charley (William Ragsdale) seeing a psychologist who tries to convince him that vampires aren't real. The first one came out in 1985 so the sequel takes place in real time, three years later. This sequel has the two main characters (Charley and Peter Vincent, host of the fictional late night horror movie show, Fright Night) return and this time they have to deal with a vengeful vampire who wants revenge for her brother in the first film. Unlike many sequels, this movie is not a rehash but instead a good continuation with some nice twists to keep the viewer guessing. Roddy McDowell was fantastic as Peter Vincent in the first Fright Night and he is just as entertaining (as always!) this time around. I only wish that his character got a bit more closure. Like the original, this one does a good job of balancing humor with creepy horror. Overall Fright Night Part 2 is not as good as the first, but still a solid sequel that will please fans of the first movie, though its not as memorable as the original. Now I just hope that the Fright Night remake is good!
Fright Night Part 2 sinks its fangs into a 5/10!

I am now caught up with the movies I have seen this summer! I therefore probably won't have a post tomorrow, but should have one up for Wednesday 6/29. See you then!